Click-y with Sabrina Queiroga

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"Breaking the 'New Me' Cycle: Uncover the Missing Piece to Sustainable Change"

Discover the overlooked step that transforms resolutions into lasting transformations.

Have you ever said at the beginning of a year or a project: "New Year, New Me" or "This time everything will be different"? After that, you change something, like a new haircut or clothing, or start a new good habit, such as juicing or eating more greens. The future ahead looks bright and promising! But as time passes and life starts to happen, you start struggling a little bit; some days are good, and others are not so nice. At the end of the quarter, if you dare to do an honest assessment, you notice that the initial plan didn't work exactly how you expected, your enthusiasm is gone, you are even tired of doing all this work to be healthier, or to keep growing or even to be happier. 

It's when you might want to split the fault. You were doing your best, but you have a house to take care of, kids demanding attention and challenging you, and you need to work hard; you have a living to make, a partner, and so many other things you would love to do, and it seems too much you are not wonder woman, you don't have supper powers. 

Here comes the trap. You put your desires and dreams aside and start to rationalize: 

Maybe soon (when a specific condition changes), I will be able to do (something that you want)

Like you, I've been to this place several times.

"When my kids are older, I'll have my mornings…"

"If I didn't have dogs, I could meditate the first time in the morning…" 

"In the winter, it is too cold to run in the morning I'll do it in the summer…"

BUT

My kids are older, and I still have to give attention to then

I have two dogs, and meditating for the first time in the morning is the same challenge it was before

Waking early in the summer is more brutal than in winter because we stay up late because we have light till ten o'clock at night

It looks like a deadlock, but it's not. There is an essential missing step that is easily overlooked.  It is something you need to work on it continuously, and it's what will sustain your energy to achieve your goals and dreams. Before working on your to-do list, the actions you want to take will lead you to your goals. 

The first step to any change is to become aware and work on your PREMISES. What are the beliefs you have concerning your goals?

You will have trouble achieving your desired results if you have a conflicted mind.

 If you want to be fit but hate exercising, eating veggies, consider yourself lazy, and love binging on your favorite TV show… Forcing yourself to do things you don't like won't work because you need too much energy to sustain willpower over time.  

You can analyze where your beliefs come from (previous experiences, earlier traumas…) and check if they are true or if it's a perception that worked for you in the past, but now it's limiting your life, and REFRAME. Open your mind to questioning and testing new things and catch destructive thoughts like

1.I know this already!

Any time you hear it, catch it and change it; what can I learn from it? Knowing something is very different from experiencing and doing it. There is always a new level of mastery.

2. This won't work for me!

If you think about changing, but when you define the steps to do it, you think I already did it, or it won't work for me. Catch this thought and change it to How can it work for me? Train your brain to be more creative. 

Once you have worked through your premises and feel good about the changes you will make, you will have what is necessary to endure moments of discomfort and challenges when life throws a curve ball.  Remember, you have an infallible guiding system working 24/7 to show if you are on the right path.